For the New Year: A Pip and Smidge Parade

Man!

I can’t believe how many beard hats you can find on Etsy!

How can I possibly pick just one?

Merry Xmas

Excuse me. Do you have any treetop angels that aren’t so… bosomy?

And that don’t sport a Lita Ford haircut?

Is this what happened to all of the unsold Jem dolls?

The Day Tofu Came Over

Yesterday as Beth and I were on our way to breakfast we came upon a dog in the street. He was wet and scared. We tried to get him to come to us but he kept running away. We made a quick stop at the corner gas station where I bought a piece of beef jerky in the hopes I could bribe him into coming with us. When we found him again he was in someone’s front yard. We cornered him behind these trash cans and with the help of a neighbor were able to get a collar and leash on him. We took him to check for a chip as he had no tags. (And as it turned out no chip.) Something he did have was his balls. Which made me pretty nervous about inviting him into our house. We held off on fixing Pip and Smidge until they got some more weight on their bones. We’re planning on doing it in January. (Well, having it done, we’re not going to do it ourselves.)

We bathed him and gave him food and water and a place to lay down in a warm bathroom. And we made flyers that we (Beth actually) put them up around the neighborhood. He whimpered a lot behind the bathroom door. Sorry dude, can’t have you running around my house with nuts on. I went to the pet supply store to pick him up a bully stick to keep him company.

At the store I got the call from Beth that his owner had called and was already on his way. And that his name was “Tofu.” Not the name we gave him. Beth want to call him “Monty” and I wanted a name that reflected the fact that he was wet when we found him. So I called him “Sop.” So we decided his official name would be “Monty the Sop.”

He had gotten out the night before so he was walking the streets for a quite some time already. A part of me was a little sad to see him go. I was already making plans for him to be adopted by my mom or my sister. But I’m glad he’s back at home.

People please tag and fix your dogs. You never know when they might get out.

When God was handing out brains…

I think  He picked them off of this.

*Feel free to substitute the word “passing” for “handing” if that’s how those jokes went in your neighborhood.

Smidgin V. Sanuk